miércoles, 28 de julio de 2010

If you don't know me why do you want to add me? and other Facebook conflicts

Facebook is really big right now, amazingly big, can't live without big. My mom has Facebook even tough she thought that only the owner could see their own wall and the comments on pictures, she couldn't upload pictures or do pretty much, anything there.
I always thought it was uncomfortable when some that you don't know so much, or someone that you don't want to give access too (a boss for example) tried to add you and you couldn't ignore them. I didn't want the guy that I met just once to look at all my pictures and see my posts! But you had to add them right? Just in case you ran into them again. Well yes, but now Facebook new privacy settings allow you to choose how much you're sharing with people, this has caused a lot of conflicts in addition to the ones that were there from the beginning:
- You don't know me, I've never seen you and you look creepy in your profile picture, why do you want to add me?: There is actually guys that "collect" girls in facebook that they think are pretty, if a girl falls for that she's definitely far from being classy; there is also the person that assumes he knows everyone but maybe doesn't remember; and there is the person that wants to feel important and have a profile saying XXXXX has 1000 friends. Good for you! everyone on the planet knows about your life and sees your pictures, kidnappers won't have it hard finding you.
Don't get me wrong, I know of people that have met friends or boyfriends on FB but in that case, please people send a private message aknowledging the fact that you don't know them but want to meet them. A week ago a guy that I'm sure I don't know, and looked really weird on his picture wanted to add me, why would I?. I don't want to see posts about what's his face and his plans for saturday night, or even worse, him having my pictures as a wallpaper (photoshoped with his face in it.) If you try to add me like that, you're not making your self look better (eheem stalker ehemmm)
- How much privacy is too much: I was a victim of privacy settings, I didn't realize that if a person couldn't see a wall or pictures, they were seeing pretty much, well, nothing! a couple of them deleted me and other ones send me private messages asking why or knew that it was a mistake and letting me know. I have a friend that was sick of Facebook and decided to set everything as private, a lot of people will delete her for sure thinking that she blocked them.
- There is also the overly friendly person, that you don't know much, but may or may not have one friend in addition to you, that loves to creep and comment on everything you do. do you delete that person, or just block them from writing or seeing your things?
- Parents on Facebook: So many parents are on Facebook, that their friends ask them to open an account "to share with them", thanks people! I didn't want to share some pictures (nothing illegal!) with my mom. Before this privacy settings, I just ignored requests from anyone older than 40, now I can just set everything on private and hope for the best.
- TMI: The best type of TMI is relationship TMI. Believe me if I don't like drama in my own life, I don't want to relive every moment of your tormentous, latin soap-opera like relationship with your on-and-off boyfriend. What are relationship status for on Facebook? Don't your closest friends know if you have a boyfriend or not? And even worse I don't want to know that you had a fight, he cheated on you, that you think all men suck and should die because someone has made you suffer again.
And there is the emo people too, come on! if you have depression, life doesn't make sense and want to die, I don't think Facebook is the right answer, therapy might be right for you. People won't believe that you're really depressed (just really desperate for attention), there was one guy who even wrote: I'm depressed, please call me. I think that instead of calls, people deleted his number from their phones- a lot of them.
Well, the privacy issue is complicated, I have a rule, I ask myself if I would say that comment in a conversation with anyone on my list, if the answer is "no", I'd keep it to myself. It is better to be safe, maybe I did add a creepy unknown guy without noticing him, and I'll never talk to him when I see him but he'll know by heart all the colors I own bikinis in.

miércoles, 21 de julio de 2010

The Twilight Syndrome

Lately, I've seen many friends (fans or not fans of Twilight) to fall victims of the Twilight syndrome or thinking that the best type of love is extra-dramatic and has to be difficult to overcome such difficulties.
I'm a fan of stable relationships, no roller coaster rides, trust above all and a normal level of commitment and need to see each other. Sure, guys that are too good are boring, a little bit of and edge is good, but edge does not equal having to send a private eye to follow him, to verify he's not cheating on you for the 1000 time when he said he went to buy some tomatoes at the grocery store.
I believe in a point system, a person should win points by being good to you, those points should be the base for trust and feelings. I need to fall more and more in love with time and build trust from scratch not from a negative qualification in my points system.
I can be corny sometimes, I write love letters and poems, but all of them to people that deserve it and make me happy at the time; not because I am on top of the roller coaster ride that day or they stopped behaving bad like other days.
To give my opinion about Twilight, I have to clarify that I have read the books, first I was curious and after I wanted to see if she became a vampire or not lol (it's true!)
I didn't like the books, but I am not discussing if they were well written or not, or if the story line was good, is that lady's idea of romance what I discuss.
Apparently Edward Cullen is romantic, a vampire that did nothing but mess with Bella's regular and normal life, that behaved weird and was a little bit emo, on top of things he sparkles. This teenager relationship resulted in a break-up that sent her to a psycho trip in which she heard voices, saw faces and jumped off cliffs.
Jacob was the normal one, the more stable one, the one that was funny and happy all the time, that made her happy and think about other things that didn't include suicide methods 101.
So now the guy that doesn't want you at first, the one that cheats, lies, treats you like trash; but starts wanting you and behaving better is more valuable than a good guy? I don't think so!
Because people rarely change and they'll most probably go back to their bad ways again, and the rollercoaster ride starts again! Because he know you'll take his emo-lying-cheating butt back.

lunes, 19 de julio de 2010

Glorious Moments in Ontario's Public Transit

I've had laughs and I've wanted to throw up many times in Ontario's public transportation (either from bad smells, or lousy bus drivers that break like seeing people being thrown to the floor is their hobby), some bus drivers are not good for their jobs and often not very nice to people, but know the stories will focus on fellow public transit users.

- Guy that throws indian food: today, the guy that inspired me to write this blog was sitting in the seat perpendicular to mine, we both had an empty seat next to us, but he decided it was convenient to loudly and violently place a giant bag with food in my seat, the smell of curry and the noise startled me, even when I was busy reading my funny book and listening to a Kesha song on my Ipod (yes, I like a few of her songs, but I don't think she is a singer but an entertainer). Well, I gave him a wondering look that he choose to ignore and he let the plates next to me for the next 15 minutes until he got off the bus.

- Guy that fell sleep sitting and his head fell on his lap and got the bus dirty: OK, this one is unbelievable but true, I got on the bus and no one was sitting on a 2 meters radio of this guy, he looked druged-stoned-high-depressed-lacking sleep, and a couple more conditions of that type. He was sleeping, but not reclined to the window like a semi-normal person, he was bended and sleeping almost reclined in his own lap, next to him, a news paper. I looked at the floor and I saw a suspicious liquid spilled all over the bus, no, it was not yellow (thank God!) it was brown, I noticed a Tim Horton's iced cap on the side of the newspaper and I got it.

- Woman with colorful tennis shoes in the air and screaming on the phone: OK, sadly, this is not uncommon on my commute from Bram-town, but this woman was specially annoying. She was wearing very bright clothes, including some tennis shoes that I saw up close (sadly), she was sitting right behind me and decided that her seat was not big enough for her legs and/or wanted to show people her amazing shoes to make them envy her. She was having a screaming fight with what sounded like her ex-husband or ex-boyfriend and was dating some "whore" now (sight!) I shouldn't know that.

- Couple fighting and reconciling in a 20 min subway ride: I was very happy, coming back from a good date on the subway from Downtown TO, while I was smiling I noticed a couple fighting in spanish (I just heard a couple of words, they were at least somewhat discrete). The fight went a little bit like this:
Union: Him trying to grab her hand, her pushing him (and his hand) apart
Queen: She started to cry and what I think it was talking about how bad he behaved
Dundas: He managed to grab her hand and whispering to her ear that he'll never do it again (well, I guess), she continued to cry
Bloor: He made her hug him until she well- did hug him
This kind of soap opera is not rare, yesterday I witnessed an indian couple doing the same, and always the girl cries and tries to "ignore him" and ends up forgiving him.
I wonder, if they did something THAT BAD why did they go on the subway with him, obviously they were going to forgive him. Why don't they end up the fight where it started instead of grating us with a free soap-opera? Are they fight-exhibitionists and enjoy people watching? Is it foreplay? Will they sell tapes of their fights? Will those tapes be easier than watching my colombian soap operas in Megavideo? just asking...

- Drunk Girl pole dancing /little asian girl pole dancing: When the latin couple ended their fight, the entertainment continued with the drunk girl that decided pole dancing in front of her friends was funny (yes, it was funny. yes, I laughed), she had serious skills! she grinded the pole like a pro (not that I know much about the topic asides from a couple of rap videos I have stumbled upon)

To be continued... (until I have a car and can use it in a month)