lunes, 19 de julio de 2010

Glorious Moments in Ontario's Public Transit

I've had laughs and I've wanted to throw up many times in Ontario's public transportation (either from bad smells, or lousy bus drivers that break like seeing people being thrown to the floor is their hobby), some bus drivers are not good for their jobs and often not very nice to people, but know the stories will focus on fellow public transit users.

- Guy that throws indian food: today, the guy that inspired me to write this blog was sitting in the seat perpendicular to mine, we both had an empty seat next to us, but he decided it was convenient to loudly and violently place a giant bag with food in my seat, the smell of curry and the noise startled me, even when I was busy reading my funny book and listening to a Kesha song on my Ipod (yes, I like a few of her songs, but I don't think she is a singer but an entertainer). Well, I gave him a wondering look that he choose to ignore and he let the plates next to me for the next 15 minutes until he got off the bus.

- Guy that fell sleep sitting and his head fell on his lap and got the bus dirty: OK, this one is unbelievable but true, I got on the bus and no one was sitting on a 2 meters radio of this guy, he looked druged-stoned-high-depressed-lacking sleep, and a couple more conditions of that type. He was sleeping, but not reclined to the window like a semi-normal person, he was bended and sleeping almost reclined in his own lap, next to him, a news paper. I looked at the floor and I saw a suspicious liquid spilled all over the bus, no, it was not yellow (thank God!) it was brown, I noticed a Tim Horton's iced cap on the side of the newspaper and I got it.

- Woman with colorful tennis shoes in the air and screaming on the phone: OK, sadly, this is not uncommon on my commute from Bram-town, but this woman was specially annoying. She was wearing very bright clothes, including some tennis shoes that I saw up close (sadly), she was sitting right behind me and decided that her seat was not big enough for her legs and/or wanted to show people her amazing shoes to make them envy her. She was having a screaming fight with what sounded like her ex-husband or ex-boyfriend and was dating some "whore" now (sight!) I shouldn't know that.

- Couple fighting and reconciling in a 20 min subway ride: I was very happy, coming back from a good date on the subway from Downtown TO, while I was smiling I noticed a couple fighting in spanish (I just heard a couple of words, they were at least somewhat discrete). The fight went a little bit like this:
Union: Him trying to grab her hand, her pushing him (and his hand) apart
Queen: She started to cry and what I think it was talking about how bad he behaved
Dundas: He managed to grab her hand and whispering to her ear that he'll never do it again (well, I guess), she continued to cry
Bloor: He made her hug him until she well- did hug him
This kind of soap opera is not rare, yesterday I witnessed an indian couple doing the same, and always the girl cries and tries to "ignore him" and ends up forgiving him.
I wonder, if they did something THAT BAD why did they go on the subway with him, obviously they were going to forgive him. Why don't they end up the fight where it started instead of grating us with a free soap-opera? Are they fight-exhibitionists and enjoy people watching? Is it foreplay? Will they sell tapes of their fights? Will those tapes be easier than watching my colombian soap operas in Megavideo? just asking...

- Drunk Girl pole dancing /little asian girl pole dancing: When the latin couple ended their fight, the entertainment continued with the drunk girl that decided pole dancing in front of her friends was funny (yes, it was funny. yes, I laughed), she had serious skills! she grinded the pole like a pro (not that I know much about the topic asides from a couple of rap videos I have stumbled upon)

To be continued... (until I have a car and can use it in a month)

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